


i got you

by keeks414



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Character Study, Emotional Hurt, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Other, Team as Family, kind of?, like theres a scene thats not canon and then the rest happens abt a year later so, this is mostly abt molly and theres not much dialogue cs i cnt write it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-07
Updated: 2018-05-07
Packaged: 2019-05-03 07:50:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14564400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keeks414/pseuds/keeks414
Summary: ''One's us and one's you.''





	i got you

_Well, one's us and one's you._

It probably shouldn't have been as much of a surprise as it was to Molly because well. They _did_ know each other only for what? A week? Not even two. However Fjord's retort still left Molly with a weird, unpleasant feeling that he had no idea what to do with.

Jester's spell faded away and slowly the rest of the Mighty Nein had exited the room, leaving Fjord and Molly alone in awkward silence. Fjord looked like he wanted to say something but kept changing his mind and just glancing in Molly's direction, a situation that any other time the tiefling would've escaped with a grin and a lie but he was so fucking exhausted. This really wasn't how he wanted that conversation to go and even if they had all accepted him, more or less, he felt too open and vulnerable for his liking.

''Just spit it out,'' he said. ''Let's get this over with because I really don't wanna deal with it in the morning.''

Fjord frowned, seemed to think of a better way to say whatever it was that was bothering him. A part of Molly hated that in the moment, he would have appreciated if he just said it, harsh or not.

Finally, Fjord sighed and looked Molly in the eyes. ''The fact that you don't know anything about your- the guy before you, means you have no idea what or who could come and bite you in the ass once your past catches up with you.'' There was something about his look that made Molly look away. He never had problems with eye contact, in fact he usually used it to his advantage, but this time it was too much and he could see where Fjord was going with this. That extremely unpleasant feeling from before only grew. He felt like throwing up. ''It will catch up to you, and you don't know what to expect. We, as a group, don't know what to expect.''

_You could be a liability_ , was left unsaid but it seemed to hang in the air between them.

It was kind of obvious how badly Fjord wanted to keep their little unstable group together. Molly needed it to work because he pretty much had nothing else but two swords, his coat, a pack of cards and this group. No matter how confident he was in this person he built in the past two years there were often moments when he felt empty, like there was something missing, like there was _so_ much missing. Being with people helped. Being a part of a family, a part of anything really, helped. He was sure that being alone would be unbearable- he just wasn't a person who could lead that lifestyle.

So why he needed this group wasn't hard to guess. Fjord though? Molly wasn't sure and didn't care too much, it wasn't his business. But it was obvious he wanted it to work in a way he carefully reassured Caleb when the wizard seemed like he'd flee any second, or tried to reason with Nott when they found out more about her intentions than they had planned. Also, by what he'd heard from the others, he was quite ready to fight Caleb because of that scroll. Because they were a team and they might all be a bit selfish and rough around the edges, which was fine, but not when it endangered the whole group.

There was a big possibility that one day Molly's circumstances would do just that.  And Molly was just one person in a group, it wasn't hard to guess who would Fjord pick if needed.

_One's us and one's you._

Maybe he should have waited and dealt with this some other time.

''Look,'' Fjord probably realised that Molly was starting to panic, the perceptive bastard. ''I know you don't care about who Lucien was and what kind of shit he did. I'm just saying it's dangerous and it's worrying me. We don't know what might come after you.''

''Yeah, yeah I get it. Just- Okay.'' _Fuck_ this. Molly really just wanted to sleep. Maybe drink until he can't think anymore. Everything felt so overwhelming, the fact that Fjord might just want him simply gone hurt more than it should. One time Yasha had told him that he gets attached too fast and she was right, Molly fucking hated when she was right. ''How about a compromise?''

Fjord raised his eyebrow. ''Sure? Go on.'' He sounded confused, which was something, since he was usually good at conversations. The tone of his voice made Molly think that Fjord hated this situation almost as much as he did. Or maybe Molly was just desperate.

''If- Or when, whatever, all that bullshit catches up with me, I will do everything in my power to make sure that I'm the only one that has to deal with it.'' The argument was weak, he was aware that Fjord wasn't planing to help Molly clean up his messes, just a day ago Beau told Nott they should deal with their personal shit during their own time. But he was really desperate and had nothing else to offer. ''Put it this way. The moment it seems like I could get the group in trouble because of whatever is in that guy's past, I'm walking away.''

The silence that followed lasted less than a minute but it felt like hours. It helped a bit that he could hear cicadas through an open window. Usually they made a great atmosphere and Molly loved them but he had a feeling this moment might ruin them for him forever.

''Okay.'' Fjord was avoiding his eyes now, too. ''Okay. We'll talk more about this some other time.''

Both his tone and expression were odd, Molly had no idea what to make of it. He seemed unsure, a bit uncomfortable. Perhaps that wasn't the response he wanted or he just felt bad, perhaps Molly completely misread the situation and he wasn't sure what would be worse.

Exhaustion won. Fuck it, they'll just discuss all of it later. Even though he really dreaded it but it was better than right now. Molly took off his coat and looked over at Fjord, laying on the bed with his back to him. A small, hopeful part of Molly was still sure he'll be able to dodge whatever might come after him, so he tried to grip and hang on to that part.

 

* * *

 

 

They never talked more about it. Never even mentioned that night at all.

Time passed and Molly almost forgot about that conversation completely. Time passed and the Mighty Nein wasn't that much of a group anymore but more like a family. Maybe not just yet, though slowly and steadily getting there.

Molly almost forgot about Lucien, Cree and the fact that there was so much he didn't know that could ruin what he had with these people he loved very easily.

 

So naturally, life decided he was getting too carefree, too happy, and decided to throw someones fucking past at him again.

It was like the time he ran into Cree, just worse, so much worse. Because now everyone knew he didn't know this person, they knew he was talking out of his ass. He thought that maybe that should've made it easier and well, he already did this, he can get through it again.

Suddenly that night was clear in his mind, a promise he made to Fjord was hanging over his head. It was probably his anxiety but he could feel Fjord starring at him while he tried to charm his way out of a mess that was this situation.

Unfortunately, a young drow woman wasn't easy to fool. Where Cree had been so openly relieved this woman was guarded, Molly could see that she was happy but she kept asking questions and she was getting increasingly more doubtful. She kept glancing at the rest of them and with time she looked more and more disapproving and annoyed. Molly was sure he spent more of the conversation nervously laughing than actually answering her questions.   

It was going horribly and that much was obvious to all of them. Finally Fjord interfered, explaining to her how they travelled for a long time and needed rest. The woman, he didn't even know her name, just nodded and wordlessly went back to her chair in the corner. Molly really fucking loved that man.

As Fjord went to rent rooms and the rest of them found a table, she took her violin and began to play.

Of course, the song sounded familiar. It made something in him ache, made him just want to go to her and tell her the truth. He resisted the need and just looked at her, realising she was already staring at him. Her eyes were dark brown, almost black, and it felt like she was staring at his soul.

Molly broke eye contact and joined the conversation at the table. Jester was trying her best to talk with him like nothing happened and he had never been so thankful for her ability to talk just about anything. It was comforting and it felt like her way of showing that it didn't matter, who Lucien was and who that woman was didn't matter to her. Yasha kept starring at him. It was her way of asking if he was okay without being obvious and he wanted to reassure her because he was fine, really. Except he was not but he _was_ sure that if he tried to lie about it he might just break right there.

He went to sleep early but spent the whole night awake. The violin kept playing in his head.

Fjord said nothing about the woman.

 

* * *

 

The night was slowly falling when he'd found himself in front of that same woman in the middle of the woods. He could hear cicadas again. Fucking cicadas.

Even better, she wasn't alone. There were two people with her, a half-orc woman and an orc man. The latter had a sword in one hand and a huge shield in another. A half-orc had no visible weapons but Molly recognised the cold rage in her eyes. It reminded him of Yasha, though this one didn't look like a barbarian. Still, there was something about her that made him wary.

What scared him the most was how different the atmosphere around this group was from the one in that bar with Cree. Like Beau said, she seemed to look up to him in a weird way, but it was better than this. Molly liked to think he could read people pretty well and they seemed angry and annoyed but mostly hurt. Betrayed, in a way. This felt way more personal. There was no easy way around it.

Apparently, the tree of them never even thought about easy because they looked ready to attack them at any second.

That day, the Mighty Nine had taken a job, they had to get rid of some beast that was hiding the those woods. Since it was a huge territory to cover, also 'cause they're so fucking smart, they split up. So now Molly was facing this trio with only Fjord at his side which was really fucking convenient.  

He so desperately needed a way out of this.

The drow woman tried to step closer but her orc friend put a hand on her shoulder, trying to get her attention. Molly caught him staring though he quickly averted his gaze, decidedly looking anywhere but at him. Now that he paid more attention he could see there was barely any anger in his expression, two women on both his sides radiating enough of that emotion for an army. He just seemed hurt and confused, like he would rather be anywhere else. Molly could share that sentiment.

The drow ignored her companion and looked right at the two men on the other side.

''You,'' she pointed at Molly. ''are either coming with us willingly and explaining everything, or we're dealing with the other guy and taking you with us. Don't be an idiot, you're coming with us either way.'' At her side, the orc winced. If it wasn't such a horrible situation for him Molly would've laughed, it was the same look Fjord usually had when Beau said something that was sure to get her in trouble.

The woman's voice was cold and unrelenting, he could feel some sort of magic, too. She wasn't someone they're going to just convince to let it go.

For the first time ever, Molly felt utterly hopeless. No way to talk his way out of this one. Probably not with fighting either, they were outnumbered and looking way weaker. And of course, there was that promise he had made to Fjord, that he'd leave when it looked like he could endanger the team, that they would never have to deal with his loose ends.

Now that the moment had come, nothing seemed harder than walking away. The Mighty Nein became so much more to him in a year that he wasn't sure what would he be without them. They never thought less of him for having no memories, never made him feel like he wasn't enough. He was Mollymauk Tealeaf and he wasn't empty. It was a mantra he kept telling himself since Gustav gave him a name and he slowly became a person he was at this moment, but this group made him really believe it. They didn't fit like a puzzle, they fought and bickered a lot and it took them time to start trusting each other. However, at this point? Molly was ready to go to the ends of the world for every one of them. They fought together, saved each others lives countless times. He'd seen them at their worst and at their best, just like they saw him too. Or maybe this was his worst. Standing frozen with nothing except for unshed tears in his eyes and a suffocating tightness in his throat.

But while the thought of walking away from them hurt, the thought of them getting hurt because of him was unbearable.

He was about to walk up to the weird trio before him when Fjord caught his wrist. That gentle, firm touch was almost enough to make Molly burst into tears. Which was the last thing he needed, he didn't want Fjord to _pity_ him or that be the last thing that he would remember him for.

There were so many things he wanted to say but he couldn't fucking speak.

''There's nowhere you have to go if you don't want to.'' Fjord talked slowly, loud enough just for Molly to hear while not taking his eyes of the group in front of them.

Molly was about to protest but Fjord cut him off before he managed to think of anything that might resemble a sentence. ''I know, I know what I said, what we talked about. It was so damned stupid. It was also more than a year ago,'' he finally looked at Molly, gripping his palm, ''you are so much more to me, to _us_ , now, more than I ever thought anyone could be. _We_ are so much more now.''

 

There was no time for Molly to try to respond or even to take all of it in, he doesn't have to go, Fjord wants him to stay-

A loud noise pierces the air as a knife hit a tree behind them. The falchion appeared in Fjord's hand and in a second he was standing in front of Molly and shit, yeah. They still had those three to deal with.

 

The orc's uncertainty and confusing about the sudden shift in the atmosphere made him an easy target to Molly's furious swearing in Infernal, while Fjord attacked the drow. While the orc guy didn't seem to want to fight, a strange knife appeared in the half-orc's hand as she cast a spell at Molly, similar to what Fjord used sometimes, but missed. It occurred to him that she possibly wasn't even attempting to actually hit him, these people knew Lucien and they were trying to take him alive. 

Too bad. Lucien was dead and Molly wasn't going anywhere.

 

**Author's Note:**

> its almost three 3am i dont know what this is im sorry goodnight ly


End file.
